Eschatology 10 - TQN Music Theraphy

On September 11 I wrote something about depression and my music inclination.



Let's side track for a while to my self analysis and diagnosis of the depression and the musics which I called music theraphy.



The following is the article which is an extract from another of my series called Eschatology.




Eschatology 10 - TQN


TQN is the abbreviation for Thoreqat Qodiriyyah Naqsyabandiyyah. It is a combination of Thoreqat Qodiriyyah and Naqsyabandiyyah formulated in Mecca by Syaikh Ahmad Khatib bin Abdul Ghaffar al-Sambasi al-Jawi.


Thoreqat can be understood as a system by which man can get closer to GOD. Beginners would be required to memorise and read repeatedly certain verses from the Quran and teachings of Prophet Muhammad in order to train himself to remember GOD consistently within 24 hours and 7 days a week.


Syaikh Ahmad Khatib received a legitimacy (khirqoh) as a legitimate teacher (mursyid) of both Tariqah Qodiriyyah and Naqsyabandiyyah. He was a prestigious Indonesian religious scholar (ulama) but became a permanent resident in Mecca and died there in 1878.


He had many followers and representatives world-wide. In Cirebon, a Central Java District of Indonesia, TQN was represented by Syaikh Ahmad Tolhah bin Talabudin.


In 1908, Syaikh Ahmad Tolhah appointed Syaikh Abdullah Mubarok bin Nur Muhammad, as his representative and leader (khalifah) of TQN at the Pondok Pesantren Suryalaya in Tasikmalaya, Indonesia. Syaikh Abdullah is passionately known as Abah Sepuh by the TQN ikhwan (members).


When he died in 1956, his son KH. A Shohibulwafa Tajul Arifin, who is known as Abah Anom, took the lead. He lead the TQN movement to nation building by improving their education, sosio-economy, irrigation system, agriculture and hydro-electricity.


TQN is a moderate religious group helping man to balance between spiritual obligations and worldly affairs. Ustaz Ali bin Mohamed as the khalifah of TQN in Singapore, shown a good example by working together with MUIS and the government to save humanity from destruction.


There will always be differences between 2 person. But with diplomacy and compromising we are building bridges of understanding. If we begin with hairsplitting of differences then understanding is almost impossible.


I had the oppurtunity to attend the 2-day Tasawwuf Seminar organised by TQN on 5 and 6 February 1989. Many ikhwan from Singapore, Indonesia, Malaysia, Thailand and Brunei attended the seminar. But I did not havea n opportunity to attend their regular classes on religious knowledge.


Although I had a friend as an ikhwan, but there do not seem to be any ushering of visitors to be a member. Perhaps I should have surrendered myself to Ustaz Ali. But I did not meet him in person and did not talk to anyone about my intention. Thus, it was only a one-session experience.


However, the acappella recitation of the 99 names and attributes of God by some ikhwan drew my fullest attention and emotion. I sang it along.


In one of the session during the seminar in Khadijah Mosque at Lorong 29 Geylang, I observed and learned the head movement when reciting the zikir "La ilaha ill Allah" as follows:-


La - the head turn to the left


ila - turning the head to the right


ha - head looking up


ill - head looking down


Allah - head looking up again and down



then....back to 'La' and repeat the above.


The recitation had a slow start with the warming up of the head movement. However, the word 'ill' is stressed with a comanding note.


As the recitation got faster the head moved vigourously up and down. The commanding note became like thunder.


At the fastest speed the head movement is like the 'head banging' of the rockers and the recitation is like the gurgling of a steam engine.


Sometime in May 1997, when I got drifted far away from God and became obsessed with rock concert and long hair culture, I was reminded of the 'head banging' movement of the zikir of the TQN ikhwan.


The drift began in 1990 when I decided to retreat from all religious activities to give more attentions to my children's education and also partly due to night shift-work that both my wife and I had to adhere to.


Unknowingly, my life was drifting to emptiness, although I was happily married with 3 children and had a promising career. By 1994 it became a dark vacuum and I fell into the labyrinth of depression.


I took up rock music as a hobby and was so desperately clinging on to it to fill my emptiness. I was illusioned to see that some of its lyrics represented my meaningless life.


Iklim, BPR and Bon Jovi sang me lullaby to my retreat. Sad to admit but true that Mettalica had influenced me that I was 'The Unforgiven' and to me 'Nothing Else Matter' and I became 'My Friend Of Misery' who claimed to be 'Holier Than Thou' but unfortunate had found 'The God That Failed'.


A sudden Loudness whispered that I was 'Lost Without Your Love' and in'Losing You' I became 'So Lonely' and I could not 'Find A Way' home.


As I lingered in the labyrinth of darkness an Iron Maiden shouted at me not to'Fear Of The Dark'. It is a difficult road from 'Here to Eternity'. Don't go on'Wasting Love'. Do something. 'Be Quick Or Be Dead'.


My life became complicated it's like Guns & Roses.



For a while I thought I had attained Nirvana. But when they go around the stage breaking drums and guitars, I realized that I was 'Walking On The Edge' of hell with Scorpions. 'When The Smoke Is Going Down', a 'Lady Starlight' seduced me to 'Believe In Love' and she whispered a ballad that HE is 'Still Loving You.'


In Spring the flowers bloomed again and the family doctor opened his clinic. With his Emotional Intelligence, Dr Search diagnosed that I had 'Double Trouble'. I was deliberately destroying my life as I was sulking away from God. I was like a child who was beaten by his father.



In May, Wings of M Nasir finally blew me back to the shore of hope with his beautiful and adorable composition "Kepada MU Kekasih" meaning "To YOU my Love".


This song is about the Love between man and GOD, and how a man regretted his sins and repented to GOD and hope that GOD will forgive and accept him when it is time to return to GOD in Eternity.


However, like many other songs, people and fans was misguided that the composer was writing about love between a man and a woman.


Yes, in the May 1997 head-banging rock concert by the father of Malay Rock, Ramli Sarip, I was actually reciting 'La illaha ill ALLAH', the way I had recited it at Khadijah Mosque with the TQN ikhwan.


Tears of repentance welled in my eyes as the concert receded to the closing song 'KAU Yang SATU' (YOU Are The ONE).


Instantaneously, I was lifted from depression and the following week the world saw me going to Al-Khair Mosque, attending family motivation seminars.


The seminar reminded me of my days in Ba'Alwi, Muhammadiyyah, Tabligh Jamaat and Darul Arqam.


After the 3-week seminar, my wife managed to persuade me to attend the religious class conducted by Ustaz Abdul Rahman Mohamed at Al-Khair Mosque.


My life changed immediately to a sunshine meadow after a thunder storm. I strongly believed it has got to do with reciting the zikir 'La ilaha ill ALLAH'.


And reciting this zikir is one of the major daily events of the ikhwan of TQN at the Khadijah Mosque. It is also a major event of the 1-week TQN Annual Maulud Celebration (Prophet Muhammad's Birthday Celebration).


Note:
Iklim, BPR, May, Spring, Search, Wings, M Nasir and Ramli Sarip are Malay rockers, while Bon Jovi, Guns N Roses, Scorpions, Loudness, Mettalica, Iron Maiden and Nirvana are international rock and heavy metal bands.


^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^escha daily event is to write^^^^^^^^^^^^^